"It's nothing personal. It's just business."

A ubiquitous statement made famous by The Apprentice. As we all know, this is intended to soften the blow for someone who has just been reprimanded or even fired! For countless times in my career, I have been at the receiving end - and it did help me get through. For countless times also, I have mentioned it - and it made me feel more human.

I have always appreciated it when colleagues, clients and partners say this to me. And I have never doubted their sincerity.

However, now that I am thinking about it, this all too familiar statement is starting to seem inaccurate and even insincere to me. So much so, that I think I should never use it again.

I have come to realize that as far as I am concerned everything, including business, is PERSONAL!

Some thoughts that led me to this conclusion:

• After I reprimand someone at work, it's convenient to say that it's nothing personal - just so I drive to the point but do not hurt feelings... at least not too much. Or perhaps to rid myself of the emotional burden of hurting someone - sort of a quick fix. BUT if we praise someone at work, is it nothing personal too? Just business?
• Some may contend that it's personal when you praise but its just business when you reprimand. Sounds conveniently nice, but I don't quite buy it - it's very inconsistent. All the people I have worked with, I have sincerely considered as friends. When a friend makes mistakes, I talk to him or her about it. And I am not one to hide behind pleasantries, I show them how I really feel - but I am tactful about it. BUT at the end of it all, I forgive. I think this is better than hide all the emotions and wait until it all bursts out. If they are really friends, and if your reprimand is justified, they should understand and work towards correcting their mistake.
• If they cannot correct it, perhaps they are in the wrong job or maybe you're not compatible in business together - but you can, of course still be buddies. True, unselfish and honest friendship enables this - though in some cases it would take time. Some would mistake that this is exactly what "It's nothing personal. It's just business." is all about. This does not work for me. When I part ways with someone, and I consider him my friend, my concern for him and his career will not disappear. At times, I have gone out of my way to help former colleagues, simply because, they are my friends. If its nothing personal, then I could have not cared less where they ended-up. I would not even care to see them.
• To simplify, suppose you are having dinner with your friend and you see prominent piece of food, say spinach, stuck between her teeth. Wouldn't it just be right if you whisper it softly to her? Sure, it would embarrass her a bit, but the embarrassment would even be more if you do not mention it and other people start noticing. It takes a true friend to do this.
  
• This leads me to a tangent but nonetheless important point - reprimand in private but praise in public. However, it is very important to me to keep everything personal and sincere. I am not doing this because it is merely my job. I am doing this because I truly care for my friend.
  
• When I am the one at fault, I expect the same candidness and personal concern. And I think I am strong enough to handle it.
  
• Emotions are a very strong driving force in people and in business - negative or positive. Things done without emotion and personal attachment tend to end-up mediocre.
  
• A lot of companies espouse or at least promote values like OWNERSHIP and PRIDE. These have very strong emotional and personal implications - how can it not be personal?
  
• If a competitor wins a strategic account or gains significant market share, at my expense, it will affect my livelihood - how can it not be personal?
  
• One of the salient provisions of the Sarbanes-Oxley Act mandates that the senior executives of the company, particularly the CEO and CFO, take personal accountability for their company's financial reports. So, if something goes wrong and the senior executives get in trouble, how can it not be personal?
  

In closing, it is all about being honest and being personally accountable for your emotions - negative or positive. I hope not to say, "nothing personal..." again in my career. The moment I do so, is the moment I stop caring.